Relic Guitars – Road Worn Guitars – Aged Guitars

Right now the guitar market place is flooded with “relic”, “road worn” and “aged” guitars. Lots of people are doing it themselves at home. Soaking their guitars in coffee, tea and god knows what else. Burning their guitars. Dragging their guitars through asphalt. Feeding it to the dog. He loves a bit of maple to chew on.


Mayer Black 1 Fake Stratocaster Copy

“People” have been inspired by “The One”….the John Mayer custom shop ’61 relic stratocaster – to bastardise their own guitars and build up replica gutars from necks, bodies, scratchplates and pickups that they have…aged at home. Johns “1961” was built at the custom shop in 2004.

You could throw some serious cash down and, along with a letter from John Mayer,  buy a COPY of a FAKE masquerading as old and authentic. But that would be really stupid wouldn’t it? How many people out there were convinced to buy a Mayer guitar, convinced by his woeful Jeff Beck impersonation on the opening to “Battle Studies”. No-one here.


Fake Plastic Trees

The Fender Custom page proudly displays many Heavy Relic® guitars…that they’ve butchered with chisels & sanders. It’s a strange marketing spin-off, but even the Fender Custom shop can’t really age a guitar – because genuine ageing is just that – GENUINE. It’s a bit like the difference between Keith Richards and Joan Rivers – they both look old except one of them is plastic – a shiny version of old. It seems that in between 1957 and about 2007 everyone’s completely forgotten what’s real and what’s not.


So, kids don’t do it – it looks naff and sad and tired and FAKE.

Buy a normal guitar and play it for thirty years. You won’t look stupid with it either because you’ll have the face to match.